So I don't know what compelled me to randomly decide to blog on this early wonderful November 17th 2009 morning. Maybe it was the natural beauty that I just experienced during the Leonid Meteor shower right now, maybe it was a need expel some thoughts that have been pacing through my mind as of late, or maybe it was the fact that I just miss plain talking to myself. hahaha. That's essentially what I think that blogging really is. Some way to communicate with yourself and tap into what's going on with yourself. Just another form of self expression. Anyways I don't even think anybody even bothers to read this thing anymore, hell or if anybody ever really read it in the first place but its always been fun for me to go back and read my old postings. It's like in the old days when you used to keep a private journal for yourself and read about how you used to think, and how your mind used to function. It's always been interesting to me to see how your priorities change. What was once valuable to you and essential to your way of life may be completely gone within the next couple of years. You change and grow into the person you are today. You can change and learn new life lessons but I always try to keep that core of who I really am as an individual and where I came from at the center of it all. I really feel like I'm just rambling and saying nothing at all. Sometimes I like to just sit and ponder about things. I have absolutely no problem with complete solitude. Just having you and absorbing yourself in your thoughts can be intriguing sometimes some of the crazy and obsure things you think about. Like right now. I had heard about the Leonid Meteor shower from all those "blah blah blah is attending Leonid Meteor Shower" on Facebook and I figured hey what the heck lets see what this is all about. So I googled it and found it was actually tonight and the peak viewing hours would begin 1am Tuesday morning. It was already 1:45am by the time I had found this out so I figured perfect, and threw on a thick winter jacket and simply laid down, my back against the ice cold concrete and proceeded to watch the skies. Surprisingly the sky was actually clear and so I figured my chances of actually seeing something would be good. After 5 minutes of just lying there on the floor, I kinda felt like an idiot just waiting for something to happen. I was just lying there wondering uhhh, so what the hell am I supposed to be looking for? But no sooner after that thought a big ball of bright white light shot right across the sky directly in front of me. It was pretty damn cool.
This is pretty much exactly what it looked like, a bright, quick, straight-lined, burst of light.
It's like all the anticipation of waiting for something, then the letdown of oh its not gonna happen this is stupid, and then the actuality of it finally happening was fun. So right after that I treated it like a shooting star and made a wish. After that I felt pretty good, cause I didn't expect to see anything so I figured I'd lay here a little longer to see if nature could really put on a good show for me. I continued to wait for about 30 minutes more and saw 2 more, and made wishes immediately after seeing them. Just the whole process of "wishing upon a star" sounds sooooo damn corny when I look at but it was fun. lol. It felt like when your a little kid and you make all these stupid wishes for things you want like toys or a new bike, video games and etc and essentially they're all just material things. But after I had made my wishes tonight I had realized I didn't wish for anything material at all. Every single wish was for something intangible. I can't say what they were cause if I do the wishes won't come true ahhh durrr, but pretty much in general I was wishing for future experiences that would bring me some happiness beyond what any material possession could give me. Sap sap sap. Sappy talk hahaha but whatever. Sometimes I feel like a philosopher okay? Gimme a break. Look I'm talking to myself again. I'm talking to myself in a blog like its a person who is gonna respond back to me. Ryan you're nuts! But if you're not nuts in this day and age you're not normal as I see it. Everybody's got there eccentricities. But I digress...Anyways I just wanted to say how beautiful, no, gorgeous would be a more appropriate term, the meteor shower was. Even though I only sat out there for 30 mins and saw three shooting stars in the freezing ass cold, it was more than worth it. It was a moving experience. Got me to free my mind and think about just anything and everything that has been going through my mind within the past few months and days of graduating and looking forward toward the future. Although these past few months have been rough looking for a job that looks promising and honestly not knowing where my life is going to take me at this point now that I'm out of school and looking to start a new chapter in my life, like the bright white shooting stars I saw tonight, I'm keeping my mindset optimistic and living by the phrase...
"The future's so bright, I gotta wear shades."
...rain
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